the paperweight

The most pointless gift ever...the paperweight. I mean seriously paper can't fly. It doesn't have legs to get up and walk away. Is our paper so untamed that we need something to hold it down with?

In every gift shop around America, the paper weight is common place. There is the executive model angled and covered in brass. The tourist model which is 3 pieces of a crocodile made to look like it is submerged in the water which is your desk. And of course the one no mother can forget or for that matter get rid of "the camp model." The rock painted and covered in lanyard. For my entire life I have wondered why in the world people would waste their money on such a stupid gift.

That is until I moved to fan country. Literally there is a fan in every workspace, in every room in my home, every store I walk into and wouldn't you know it, near every counter top I want to put paper on. It's like magic. I put some paper down turn around to grab something out of my purse and BAM!...no more paper. The worst is when I have 7 pieces of paper on my desk and someone walks in my office and says "WOW it is hot in here!" then turns on the fan. What a show...paper everywhere.

Contrary to my previous belief, I would like to reward the person who invented the paperweight. But sorry paperweight man, I will never be fooled or tempted to buy one, for I always have the "missionary model" with me - any object around me that is heavier than paper...it doesn't take a genius.


K&M


Disclaimer: we will not be accepting any donations of paperweights :) Thanks.